A Funny Story About Teaching Your Kids Morals

5th_grade_ school_blackboardAn elementary school teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment – To get his or her mom or dad to tell them a story from an actual life experience that teaches a moral at the end of it.

The next day the kids came back and one by one began to tell their stories.

Ashley said, “My father’s a farmer and we have a lot of egg-laying hens. One time we were taking our eggs to market in a basket on the front seat of the car when we hit a big bump in the road and all the eggs got broken.

“What’s the moral of that story?” asked the teacher.

“Don’t put all your eggs in one basket!”, replied Ashley. “Very good,” said the teacher.

Next, little Sarah raised her hand and said, “Our family are Farmers too. But we raise chickens for the meat market. One day we had a dozen eggs, but when they hatched we only got ten live chicks, and the moral to this story is, ‘Don’t count your chickens before they’re hatched’.”

“That was a fine story Sarah.” said the teacher. “Michael, do you have a story to share?”

“Yes. My daddy told me this story about his sister, my Aunty Sharon. It seams that Aunty Sharon was a flight engineer on a plane in the Gulf War and her plane got hit.

She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was a bottle of whiskey, a machine gun and a machete. She drank the whiskey on the way down so it wouldn’t break and then she landed right in the middle of 100 enemy troops. She killed seventy of them with the machine gun until she ran out of bullets. Then she killed twenty more with the machete until the blade broke. And then she killed the last ten with her bare hands.”

“Good heavens,” said the horrified teacher, “What kind of moral did your daddy tell you from that horrible story?”

“Stay the hell away from Aunty Sharon when she’s been drinking.”